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We are here to help you solve your problems, not just talk about them. Although there is benefit to talking through your issues with your therapist, our goal is to help you both gain the skills you need to talk to each other.
We deliver skills, not speeches.
The last thing you need to hear is a lecture on what you’re doing wrong. We believe that you already have a good idea of what you’re doing wrong. So we focus on helping you practice the skills of communicating, managing negative emotion, and resolving conflict.
We help you fight for your marriage, not your differences.
Unlike some therapists who quickly recommend their clients separate or terminate their marriage based on their differences, we advocate for your marriage. We teach you how to appreciate your differences and use them to create mutually beneficial results in your relationships.
You gain new understanding about your partner, not just new labels.
Too many therapists and psychologists diagnose with clinical labels during their sessions, giving both a name and an excuse for why one partner is pulling down the marriage. In coaching we assume that both parties have some influence over creating the positive and the negative results in the marriage.
We help you focus on the future not the past.
We deeply believe that there is wisdom in the old adage, “When you live out of the past you are bound to that which is finite. When you live out of the future, you’re bound to that which is infinite.” We recognize that there is infinitely more potential in your future together than what you have had in your past. So we focus more time, skills and practice on creating the future you want together without paying undue attention to the past.
We see you as our partners, not our patients.
We may understand the basic principles and processes to effective relating, but you and your spouse are the experts on what is happening in your relationship. We don’t see you as just someone to be diagnosed. We utilize the expertise of both partners to explore what is happening between the two of you and find new solutions to improve your conditions.
Our programs usually last no more than 6 sessions and are not open-ended.
We think it is just too convenient for your therapist to leave your treatment open-ended. If you are willing to learn, we guarantee to teach how to decrease conflict and improve your relationship in your marriage. If we sense there are other issues that need to be addressed in greater depth, we will refer you to a specialist in that field.
We can have success even if just one party wants to work on the marriage.
Although most believe that it takes two people to make a happy and successful marriage, we found that is not always the case. If one person can single-handedly destroy a marriage, then isn’t it possible that one person can single-handedly improve the marriage as well? We’ve seen it happen with dozens of couples. Now obviously at some point we want your partner to learn how to communicate and improve the marriage as well, but we have to start somewhere. Remember that “Two heads are better than one, but one head is better than none.” If, for whatever reason, your partner is unwilling to get help on the marriage, call us and we’ll help you build a plan to work on the marriage.
We understand that speed is of the essence.
When it comes to marriage relationship problems, we know that couples need to make progress quickly in order to feel motivated to continue. We leverage momentum in our sessions to get immediate results with the skills you learn, and then teach you to create the same kind of results long term.
Marriage Coaching empowers couples.
Our motto is “Give a man a fish, feed him for a day. Teach him how to fish, feed him for a lifetime.” We know that unless we truly empower couples with the skills, tools and habits of effective relating, then the relationship will constantly be strained and STARVED. Our approach is designed to help you and your partner feed your marriage, not only while you are in our office, but throughout the rest of your life.